Hope Hicks has notoriously bad taste in men. It does not surprise me that Hope, with her Venus/Libra chart, worked on a smoothing-over for her new boyfriend. In case my snarky hinting wasn’t good enough, I believe Hope Hicks is Trump’s comare, not Nikki Haley. She and Trump have bigly chemistry, #Sad. Hope Hicks is comfortable steaming Trump’s pants while he wears them, comfortable touching his lower body at work. She is famously the one that soothes the savage beast. I may be an old fat lady these days, but I used to be a savage-beast soother too. I know the game. She humors him in everything he asks, I’m sure.
People have been saying I’m wrong, first with the Nikki Haley thing and now with Rob Porter. In my estimation, the fact that she has romantic links to both Porter and Cowey Lewandowski (who kind of talks like Elmer Fudd sometimes) is not conflicting. The thing is, Hope doesn’t have to be spending “business” weekends away with Trump to be his comare. Arnold Schwarzenegger knew at least 1,000 bikini models who would have loved to be his side piece. But he had a second family with the housekeeper, because that’s the one who was always there. This is how men work in real life IMHO. People become increasingly familiar with face time.
Anyway, as I said, Hope’s taste in men is questionable. So, gentle reader, let’s Astrosplain the one who will soon get away, Hope’s cover boyfriend, Rob Porter.
The potential for malice is front and center in this chart. The Sun is in Scorpio, making Mars and Pluto co-rulers of the chart. Mars the God of War is one of the traditional malefic or trouble-making planets, Saturn being the other. And both of those play important roles in this chart. Pluto was not a traditional co-ruler because we have only recently discovered it, originally Scorpio was Mars. But Pluto represents the devil, and Scorpio is his sign now. Scorpios can be very sexy. They are secretive and controlling, which can be very 50 Shades if you’re into that sort of thing. But a lot of people are drawn in by the mystery of Scorpio, the penetrating gaze.
There are always different ways to use any astrological feature. A quick reminder here that I’m talking about one individual about whom certain facts are known. So this is not a positive or neutral interpretation. I’m looking at someone who behaves badly.
The key word for this chart is VOLATILE. As mentioned above, the Sun is co-ruled here by Mars and Pluto. Just as the Sun facilitates life on this planet, the Sun in astrology shows you what the individual’s higher self’s whole point was in creating this particular body and sustaining its life. What is it here to do? Scorpio Sun says it’s here to probe, penetrate, control, polarize, clarify, manipulate. Pluto sits at the outer edge of our solar system, the marker of the point of no return. That’s why it’s so polarizing – beyond there be dragons.
But just as the Sun brings our daily dose of life on Earth, the Moon brings it back down at night. The ego does its thing during the day, all the things you’re conscious of in life, like work and websites and farting in elevators. Then comes the Moon, and we drift off to the land of nod and return with little if any knowledge of what went on for those hours. That part of the human experience, the emotional, waxing and waning, changeable part, that is the Moon in astrology. Water in astrology is influenced by the Moon just as the tides are on Earth. As I said about dear Louise Linton, disliking feelings doesn’t make them go away. It just ratchets up your maintenance level, makes you that much harder to deal with.
With Rob, it’s not that he dislikes his feelings. It’s that his feelings are really aggressive. Rob has the Moon in Aries the Ram, ruled by Mars. So while Pluto has some say in Rob’s Sun rulership, and thus the chart overall, Mars is ruling both the Sun and Moon. Speaking now as someone with extreme Mars myself, a few points. Evolved Mars is about clarity and leadership, the sensible end of the thing where Trump said he wants generals running the country. A sane person thinks, “Right, people who have been around in government for a long time and have firsthand experience leading in life-and-death situations,” the way I originally thought of General McMaster. Evolved Mars is the Archangel Michael (represented by Aldebaran, hold that thought) destroying evil with his courage and clarity.
Unevolved Mars is the God of War: impulsive, aggressive, angry, and with a chip on his shoulder. Unevolved Mars has something to prove. Mars has a lot of influence in this chart. When Mars rules the Moon the image that I get is of a town where they frack, where the tap water occasionally catches fire. That can of course be very variable depending on other chart factors. In this one, it’s like the river in Ohio that used to catch fire on a regular basis, you can anticipate flame-outs.
It takes an enormous amount of energy to sublimate water into steam. Unlike Louise Linton, Rob Porter has that much energy. One thing I learned in fire academy, steam is so much hotter than fire. That in mind, with this chart it surprises me that Porter was able to come across as enough of a polished professional to be brought into the Oval Office at all. Scorpio doesn’t get mad, he gets even.
This is already shocking to me, much less that he’s been there a year without security clearance. I can tell you from firsthand experience that getting security clearance is, at a bare minimum, a tedious and uncomfortable process. They demand an extreme amount of detailed information about your life, much more than most people have on hand. They checked me for arrests, my DNA, fingerprints, contacted teachers and neighbors from multiple addresses. That’s what they do for any employee to walk in the door at DoD, like janitors. The Porter revelation, that the FBI dinged his clearance, is very obvious FBI retaliation for releasing that idiotic Devin Nunes memo. The FBI didn’t just give him the world’s longest mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmaybe, like with Jared Kushner. They said N-to-the-O.
One really obvious key word that’s not being used about Rob Porter thus far is NEPOTISM. I see that Rob Porter is from Boston, and lo and behold, it’s Mr. Kelly grandfathering him in. Kelly, with his Venus-intensive chart, is all about the other people in his life. Boston is famous for its “homers,” who can be intensely loyal to their neighbors no matter how badly they behave. Rob’s dad, Roger Porter, is well inculcated with the Bush dynasty, and the military (Mr. Kelly) does stuff like this for him, go figure. Don’t blame Putin for this failure of democracy, blame the US Department of Defense. (I’ve never read a single word leaked by WikiLeaks or Ed Snowden. Not that I don’t care. Just that I don’t need to. I couldn’t possibly trust them any less, speaking as a former employee.)
Then Rob Porter is also a Mormon. This is another community known for its fierce loyalty, and Mormons are famously intensely polarized. If you disagree even slightly, you’re excommunicated. This is very Plutonian, very all-or-nothing. Again, Pluto features prominently in this chart, as in the chart of John Bittrolff. Aside from the cultural significance of Mormonism and the impact that culture had on what one of Porter’s wives has called Mormonism’s #MeToo, there is another clue. Porter is a Mormon from Massachusetts. That almost guarantees that his family is thick as thieves with the Romneys.
Keep in mind that these days, words are being redefined like wild, for example “complicit” and “treason.” Loyalty has met the same fate. Trump’s concept of loyalty is so twisted that Ronna Romney McDaniel has dropped the “Romney” from her name, without a squeak. Her family name is like a Birkin bag that she was born with on her face, and she promptly and quietly put it into storage when told to. This was after her Uncle Mittens got a comeuppance so severe that I need to see it again:
Anyway, back to Rob Porter’s astrology. Thus far I’ve said that Mars is the ruler of this chart, due to ruling both the Sun and Moon, in Scorpio and Aries respectively. Mars refers back to Aldebaran archetypally, I have asked you to hold that thought. (Are you holding it? Don’t let me down!) Then Pluto is also front and center due to co-ruling Scorpio. This chart is heavy on both fire and water: steam.
Onward. Mercury is quite close to the Sun here, suggesting one who identifies very much with his thoughts. In such a watery native, I would expect this to be a lack of awareness about how much he projects his emotions, and responsibility for them, onto others (Aries Moon). This is especially so with the role of Neptune in this chart. Neptune is about core integrity, the part of us which connects to our higher selves. So it’s also the place to look for any sort of not doing that, from lying to addiction to believing your own most expedient bullshit.
Rob’s Neptune is doing a few important, I would say key things. First, it’s located in Sagittarius, ruled by Jupiter. So Rob’s relationship with reality has everything to do with his desire to let the good times roll, which is substantial. Jupiter, the source of the desire for big fun (and also the planet representing the government) is in the first decan of Cancer, ruled by the Moon. So Rob’s sense of entitlement to a good time is deeply felt, ingrained from early conditioning. Jupiter is comfortable making decisions for others and spending other people’s money. He can be hugely generous, as all of the nepotism hires in Trump’s orbit know. He’s very generous with other people’s money. Especially in ways that feel good to himself. The ends justify the means.
While we’re in the Moon’s sign of Cancer looking at the deeply felt things in Rob’s life, entirely relevant to this conversation we see that Jupiter is conjunct Nessus the Wife Beater. Nessus is an asteroid, not a fixed star, and thus is much closer to Earth. Thus it uses the ordinary orbs for conjunctions, doesn’t have to be a direct hit. No pun intended. But it’s interesting that Nessus is located here at Jupiter, the Greater Benefic who usually gets the party started. I believe the key to this mystery is the Moon, not Jupiter or Nessus. The matter is currently playing out in government, which may be enough to implicate Jupiter. But clearly he lashes out when he’s not having good time. The Moon is about your moods and the way you feel.
I’ve said a lot about Jupiter on this blog, because it tends to run rampant in the sort of megalomaniacs I profile. Jupiter can be a sense of entitlement to a good time. Jupiter is ruling Neptune here because of its placement in Sagittarius. The other notable thing in Sagittarius is Juno the Spouse just a smidgin out of orb for Antares, the marker of toxic masculinity. You don’t have to be male to have toxic masculinity. From her chart it looks like Czarinka Trump guzzled the misogyny Kool-Aid in her baby bottle.
Antares is where we come back around to Aldebaran, a higher octave of Mars that I asked you to hold the thought of. Aldebaran is located directly across from Antares, at least during our lifetime. These are very distant planets of great magnitude. So when something is positioned just right to reflect them, the influence on the chart overall can be huge. Antares is kind of like a turd in the punchbowl of humanity. Antares is Beavis and Butthead, the archetypal hesher. This guy and this guy remind me of Antares. It’s the boys will be boys thing, where they just don’t have to be accountable, because they don’t want to. And you can’t make them, so there. Why does he do such rotten things? Because he’s a rotten kid.
Back to Rob Porter. As with working on the Long Island Serial Killer-adjacent, I see that sometimes things are a smidgin out of orb that appear to be quite accurately displayed in the known facts of the life. Juno the Spouse being conjunct Antares points to this exact sort of misbehavior with intimate partners, specifically the wife. This is one of those things where if someone asked me to look at her new boyfriend’s chart, and it was this, I’d tell her to run. Having that prominent Jupiter Nessus in combination with this Juno, it looks like a disaster.
There are two sides to every coin, and where there is a Nessus there is a Dejanira the Victim. Rob has Dejanira in the 1st decan of Capricorn, the least forgiving part of Saturn. For me, Saturn is the punisher. It figures prominently in the chart of serial killer John Bittrolff, linked above. In combination with Rob’s Mormon upbringing and his volatile Mars/Pluto/Moon scenario described above, this is a recipe for wife beating. Fundamentalist Christian religions often treat women as chattel, and Mormonism carries that theme. They have changed a lot since the days of routine polygamy. But they’re still biblical wives, who follow the strict code of Mormon patriarchy. Rob’s ex-wife said that the church is the absolute worst place to go for support, though it’s the only place they allow you to go. Joseph Smith, the founder of Mormonism, had 52 wives, some of whom were as young as 14. Smith surely felt like a father to many or all of his wives.
Rob’s Saturn, ruling over Dejanira the Domestic/Sexual Violence Victim, is importantly conjunct the fixed star Regulus, which has been bringing so many shitty men to the top and knocking them back down. Sitting at the tip of Leo’s tail, Regulus the Heart of the Lion is the essence of a mature Sun, a king at the end of his life looking over his kingdom. The Sun, again, represents the essence of the soul that chose this incarnation. And a Regulus contact adds megawattage to the personality, bringing people to prominence, such as Harvey Weinstein and Trey Gowdy. There are many others, but I’m too lazy to get up and look at the flow chart.
Anyway the point of Regulus is that it’s a Royal Star, meaning that if you are blessed with this great benefactor’s energy, you must behave accordingly. Lowering your integrity at all with such a Royal Star contact puts you in the path of the archangels’ wrath, like with General Kelly. I predicted he would flame out spectacularly, and he has. I now regret having given him the benefit of the doubt, that he might actually live up to the hype. He’s the worst, and I expect his after-life review to reflect that.
Just like a king on his deathbed, how that Regulus contact plays out depends on the king. Integrity will either make or break a Regulus native. Regulus puts a king on the hot seat, so it won’t be a close call at his death. With Regulus, you either rise to the challenge and lead your people to life, or you crash and burn and suffer the consequential loss of honor. Rob has already crashed, game over. Buh-bye.
So all of this, gentle reader, makes for a very angry guy, who believes he’s the boss, and in the dark corners of his mind probably believes his wife is chattel. Jupiter is easygoing. He doesn’t like to be annoyed with pesky details and reality checking. Rob has a very angry Moon, and Pluto keeps him stirred up. Pluto is possessive and can be paranoid. Jupiter is hugely egotistical and entitled. Mars is always itching for a fight, even when he’s acting like Archangel Michael – which the Antares connection suggests he’s not even interested in doing. I’m giving him that Juno Antares based on that picture of his ex-wife’s black eye, though it’s technically out of orb.
There’s so much to talk about with this chart that wow, I’m only now getting to the chart’s shape, aspects, and lesser influences. Crikey. This is a bucket chart with the Moon as the handle. A bucket chart has one planet acting as an energetic fulcrum within the personality, and is basically a chart co-ruler for this reason. Here it’s the Moon, which again governs the moods, again in Aries, the overtly aggressive face of Mars. So Rob’s machismo is the main point of his life IMO. It’s the way he feels about himself as a man, literally his feelings about it. Not his thoughts (Mercury). Not what he can show he’s accomplished (Saturn). His feelings about it, the Moon. That’s what his Jupiter is doing, revving up the happy fun-time feelings — or at least the desire for them. That’s an important caveat. Because I don’t know about Rob, but stuff doesn’t always go the way I want in my life, and sometimes I find it annoying.
So in this bucket chart, there are a few obvious aspects, several key planets really dominating the dynamics. Mars, the Moon, Pluto, and Jupiter are basically the show-stealers, with Neptune acting as the WD40 that lubricates the whole thing to roll like the egg we’re watching on cable news right now.
If you look at Jupiter over there in Cancer, he’s agitating that whole cluster in Libra, everything from Venus to the North Node and possibly Seginus, with those red lines to the square aspects. I’m adding in all the other stuff, the North Node and stuff, because all of those things are right on Pluto, who again, is a chart co-ruler. And while we’re zeroing in on Rob’s Pluto, note that it is in opposition to the bucket handle, the Moon. The Moon is the internal equilibrium, and Pluto is the ragey part. This would tend to make Rob an all-or-nothing guy, one who’s either very into something/someone or very not. He’s either feeling you or he’s not, and it probably goes back and forth pretty quickly.
So Jupiter is aggravating everything from Venus — Rob’s connection to other people and specifically women — to the highly sensitive North Node, including Vesta the True Believer and Algorab the Crow. Seginus the Guard, the dog giving the entire Trump administration fleas, is an RCH out of orb for Seginus, which I am using as a karmic connector to Trump himself personally. A lot of them have it, and it brings disgrace through association. Gentle reader, I appreciate that you are too kind to curse my laziness, which prevents me from getting up and looking at the flow chart.
This means that basically that good-time-Charlie urge within Rob Porter, where he likes to be the Big Man on Campus, the homecoming king, doesn’t always mesh with the way he connects to other people, specifically women. The North Node is a perfected spot in any chart, representing where the life will end karmically, what the theme will be on the last page of this particular book of life. Mind you all of this friction is happening in one of Venus’ signs, Libra, where she automatically yields to keep the peace. This may be the resource Rob draws upon to charm the people who are charmed by him. He does have a lot going on in Venus, making him very people-oriented especially in a strong Moon chart. The Node conjunct Pluto suggests to me that this is a “go big or go home” life, one that does nothing by half measures.
Then chart-ruling bully Mars is having a tantrum with the Sun, flanked by Vesta and Mercury, that little set of red lines. The Sun is discussed above. Mercury is about the thoughts and words, the conscious part of the mind or at least the movement and expression of it. Vesta is the True Believer, the hill the chart native would die on. I’m giving him the conjunction to Seginus, though he is that famous smidgin out of orb. Why? Because look where he is in the Trump administration. He’s not only being ruined by association — again, Trump dropped a bomb on the FBI and they’re truthbombing back — but Generally Kelly is ruined no matter how you slice the Rob Porter fiasco. Maybe that’s what he can call his band, while he’s unemployed. Anyway his Vesta is properly conjunct Algorab the Crow, marking him as one of a group of kleptocrats, many of whom figure into this current palace intrigue, like Roger Stone and Paul Manafort.
Rob Porter is a yucky man and I’ve used a lot of words, though I do feel, gentle reader, that it’s warranted in this case. Rob is very teachable in many ways. But he is gross, and I have some important writing to do. So I’ll make one last point.
Rob’s Moon (in Aries) opposition Pluto (in Libra) is a huge problem. Pluto, when he connects with Venus, can be a complete stalker. Sneaky, manipulative, controlling, obsessed. Libra tends to make things less intense, more superficial, more charming and pleasant. His ex-wife did describe that part of him. She was not surprised that he’s done so well professionally and expects him to rise again. Rob’s Venus is actually in pretty good shape, considering how malignant his Mars is. And his life has been graced by other people, described in the nepotism area above.
But the important final point to make about all of this, look at how the blue lines go from Neptune to the Moon and Neptune to Pluto and its little clusterbomb. Rob’s Pluto is truly fraught. This is an extremely emotionally volatile individual, if I haven’t made that clear. But Neptune, the source of illusions and delusions, provides an alternate circuit, one that has those calming blue lines. In other words, Rob gets away with stuff because he was born on 3rd base, and because he is a very convincing liar.