Orrin Hatch, Astrosplained

Lilacs and Geraniums,

It has come to my attention that Orrin Hatch is still not my friend.   It’s one of those things I have known for a long time, like if I hear his name I’m getting trolled about something.  But yeah, he thinks Brett Kavanaugh‘s accuser is “confused.”  Right.

Orrin Hatch glasses

Orrin Hatch chart

  • Orrin has the Sun at 1 degree Aries, the very beginning of the zodiac.  So Mars has his boner right in your face in this chart.  Mars the God of War rules guns, and thus Orrin and the NRA are almost guaranteed to be BFFs going way, way, way back.  Mars is also combust, obscured within the Sun’s rays.  Hatch is a truly and deeply aggressive guy, much more than he probably owns up to.  His treatment of Anita Hill can really only be described as dickish.
  • Then where is Mars located?  Oh, there he is!  Right there in the Gauquelin sector that 5 degrees on either side of the Midheaven denoting fame, conjunct Varuna.  So this is an enormously influential person, a very famous warmonger.  Michael Avenatti and Stormy Daniels both have prominent Varunas too.  Bob Mueller has Varuna opposite Spica, so let’s see how that works out.
  • Orrin’s Midheaven is just poking out from behind the Sun’s corona at 10 Aries.  Something too close to the Sun is obscured by the corona, like how you never know the name of an A-list celebrity’s assistant.  But of course their reliance on that person is constant and total.  Then having a planet or angle just outside the corona is a whole different matter, more Kardashian.  Just far enough away from the main attraction to get tons of attention yourself.  This is so extreme, the whole thing.  Orrin Hatch is an icon of Boys Will Be Boys.
  • In other words, MARS!  MARS!  MARS!!!!  MARSMARSMARS!!!!!! Penises!  More Mars than Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, who wears out her shoes and doesn’t seem tired! Maybe more than Ariel Castro, who had three women in shackles because he needed to rape somebody like 8 times a day, literally.
  • Any dude bro with this much Mars in his chart, I check for Nessus the Wife Beater.  Orrin has Uranus conjunct Nessus.  I’m surprised Orrin doesn’t have weird hair, like John Bolton or Trump with their “screw you” Uranus placements.
  • I’m calling this a locomotive chart with a Venus in Aquarius engine, sort of a “hey women, screw you!” especially in light of the above.  Uranus the Weirdo is of course the co-ruler with Saturn the Authority Figure.  Saturn is about money and telling people what to do, your word being more important than other people’s in some way.  It’s the golden rule:  him with the gold makes the rules.  Then Uranus holds the rest of the world at arm’s length.  Of course Venus is about women specifically, but people overall, too.  It’s specifically the people in the native’s life, the connections they have.  This chart shows a very well-connected misogynist.
  • Venus is on the same degree as the Node, and conjunct Saturn.  Unfortunately this is in a sign he co-rules, too, the aloof one.  Venus conjunct Saturn (as Gentle Reader Sandy (g’day) and Donald Trump both have), is kind of unfortunate IMO.  Venus is where we find charm and pleasantry.  Then cold, selfish Saturn just takes it to a gross, material place.   Venus can be very superficial and material in Taurus, her Earth sign, and in this way she and Saturn bring out the worst in each other like with Melania Trump. Venus is good with Jupiter, really with most things except Saturn, where she’s just crass.  Even with Pluto, that can be really sexy and epic.  But Saturn is so petty, so small, so selfish.  Saturn can really kill the charm factor.  I also really hate to see Saturn the Punisher conjunct Venus in a raging boner chart, extra ribbed for her pleasure by Uranus and Nessus.  With a strong Saturn look for a miser, or with low integrity a grifter.  Both Netanyahus have iffy Neptune and banging Saturn.  Ajit Pai, too.
  • This is a really dynamic chart, crap going everywhere.  Fortunately Orrin’s whole chart is his Midheaven Aries Mars boner, which keeps him on task — MARS.  GUNS.  CONFLICT.  ME. ME. ME. ME.  ME.
  • Jupiter is in Libra in the 4th house, suggesting that family connections and his father’s money made Orrin exactly who he is.  Surprise!
  • Orrin has both Juno the Spouse and Pholus the Beans Spiller in the 6th house, in Capricorn.  Those two are not very close.  They are not opposing anything.  Do not expect any secret meth weekends with rent boys from Orrin Hatch, or anything about his wife.  Squeaky clean, all of that.  His boner is about money and guns, and his right to be a dude bro, because ‘Murca.
  • Vesta the True Believer conjunct Ixion the Brotherfucker in Mercury’s Earth sign Virgo, in Mercury’s 3rd house.  Extreme under-bus-thrower, Hall of Fame.  Specifically will undercut people verbally and strategically, rhetorically, like he did Anita Hill.  Ixion does not play fair, that’s his point.  He is conflict-driven, like Mars.
  • Orrin has the Moon in the 12th house conjunct asteroid Machiavelli.  Machiavelli is about gamesmanship, how people manipulate and get over on each other or die trying.  The Moon herself is late in Gemini, which is unfortunate for her.  That’s a Mercury rulership, creating a disconnect from the head to the heart minds, like we see with Louise Linton.  The Moon is the part of life that we can’t control, that Mars can’t go stick a sword into.  It’s the dreams, moods, hairs standing on the back of our necks.  And with that Machiavelli in Cancer, where he does feel things, in the Moon’s sign that she rules (but is not in, ouch!).  So this would have to make him very paranoid on some level.  With the detached, non-emotional Moon, it’s hard to get under Orrin’s skin.  But when you do, it totally fucks with him.
  • Orrin has Cancer on the Ascendant, hearkening back to the 4th house Jupiter-Libra (Venus).  Remember I said this set him up to be who his father wanted him to be?  The Cancer, Moon-ruled Ascendant makes him a chip off the old block in that way, a guy who comes across very familiar and down-home to his demographic. Another “Evil Wilford Brimley” like Chuck Grassley.  Cancer Ascendant makes a sentimental favorite.  But his Moon, the part where he would actually feel that and have it be real, is ruled by Mercury, his head mind.  This is not a heartfelt guy.   And his boobs are probably no bigger than Louise Linton’s.  With all that Mars he must have the metabolism of a field mouse, and the Gemini Moon doesn’t like to feel full.
  • A lot of those dotted line aspects are fractions of squares, difficult contacts that are unlikely to ever be resolved or integrated within the overall consciousness.  Thus when you see a lot of the dotted lines, look at the table below and look for the sesquares, the little TV with a tie on sort of, and the “less than” sign.  Those are like gravel in the chart, cracks in the foundation.  Like neighbors from hell, kind of.  You’re stuck with them.  And they can make the life miserable.  Some of those are quintiles and biquintiles, like don’t throw the baby out with the bath water.  But all of that together is a lot of just not-smoothness.  Inner turmoil, things to be expressed or more likely coped with.  All of that lowers the functioning of Neptune, which is like the garbage disposal of astrology.  It’s like having a lot of broken glass and gravel in your sink disposal.  How strong is the motor?  That’s the question.  Lotta debris in this chart.
  • Last but hardly least, sneaky ass Pluto is right there conjunct the Ascendant.  And of course he’s best frenemies ruling Scorpio with Mars.  Those are two of the malefics, along with Saturn, who is going strong in this chart.  They bring bad news wherever they go, these three guys.  Pluto is the sadist, the rapist, the bully, the one who loves it when they cry.






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