I really don’t like this turtle. It’s also unethical to force animals to work in the senate for the amusement of plutocrats. Where is PETA when you really need them?
Look at that cute widdle guy!
Like a stuffy toy going, “Yep. I am getting away with it!” As a former paramedic I have a saying that comes to mind: “On the day you arrive in hell, be sure to steer clear of the paramedics’ table!”
America’s meanest amphibian was born on a day that the Sun changed signs, like Kellyanne and Spicy, if I recall correctly. So this was an interesting little exercise in determining the chart’s actual ruler.
Here are the two choices: it could be early Pisces or late Aquarius. Each of those has two co-ruling planets — Pisces ruled by Jupiter and Neptune, Aquarius by Saturn and Uranus. So I look to see which of those pairs, and which of those individual planets, is the strongest. Basically with Jupiter and Neptune I expect this guy’s shenanigans to be attributable to dishonesty and hubris. Jupiter is entitled. Saturn is greedy and likes to be in authority. Uranus thinks he’s smarter than everybody else.
- Before I can determine the rulership, note the combustion, the objects obscured within the Sun’s corona. Those are integral to the native’s identity in some way that may be hidden to the native or to others, or extremely obvious to the self but not to others. It can go either way, who is unaware of it and who is very aware of it, either the self or others.
- Mitch has asteroid Honeycutt, where we want more than our share, right near the Sun.
- Ceres the Earth Mother, where we give and receive material support, is also right there. Ceres also represents things one would go to hell and back for, that level of intensity of motivation.
- Saturn and Uranus co-rule Aquarius. They have brought in Saturn’s malefic buddy Mars, and all three are conjunct. They’re also situated on Algol the Blinking Demon, making this an extremely malefic chart. If this were Dancing With the Dark Stars, Team Malefic is looking good. Team Benefic, Jupiter and Neptune, will need to sacrifice a goat to move to the next round. Of course I’m being a smartass. But this is a brutal chart. The only one missing from this gang is Pluto, and because it’s on Algol he isn’t needed. Algol is like Pandora’s box, where anything goes. The native will explore those ideas in any direction, every direction, to any extent.
- Let me take a moment to point out that all of the above is happening in Taurus, ruled by Venus — connections to other people. This is superficial Venus’ other sign, the one where she’s very selfish and materialistic. Hold that thought.
- Jupiter and Neptune, Team Benefic, make a much weaker showing. Jupiter represents the government generally, and Mitch has been in government most of my life. So clearly this is well-manifested in the native, based on what we know. He has Jupiter on Aldebaran, the fixed star of the Archangel Michael — the demon slayer. So that’s very interesting for the light-dark dichotomy of this chart. It’s pronounced, any Aldebaran or Antares contact making this a central theme of the chart. Orcus, where we create order from chaos, is also right there. Then Jupiter is trine both Mercury and Venus, making this a person with a head for government and the connections, too. However Jupiter is across from his own sign of Sagittarius, in Mercury’s Gemini where he is on Mercury’s agenda. This is a very clever man. Jupiter is somewhat empowered by the contact with Aldebaran, but overall completely at the behest of Mercury. Jupiter is like locked out of his own house, sitting across the street at his neighbor’s. Mercury is in charge.
- The other part of Team Benefic is Neptune. Mitch’s Neptune, where we look for integrity, has both blessings and challenges. For one thing he’s in Virgo, where he absolutely does not belong. That is opposite his own sign of Pisces. This is a slow-moving outer planet that takes six weeks to move a degree, so I’m confident that it was still in Virgo even without the birth time. It’s also retrograde, giving this element of the native’s life greater difficulty, like a class that needs to be repeated and/or tutored. A retrograde person can become a superpower if the native treats it like a disability and remediates it intentionally.
- Neptune is in his detriment in Mercury’s superficial Earth sign, Virgo. It will be difficult for this native to move his eyes away from the material world. He likely has no sense of the sacred, with Mercury overruling the higher self. This is reflected in his absolute mastery of both propaganda and procedure. Both at the same time. Virgo is about minutiae, and not being affected by others.
- Mercury is in a yod with the Sun and Pluto. Pluto is about skullduggery, fanaticism, manipulation, and destroying things to rebuild them completely. The Sun is about the ego.
- Lastly, Neptune is in a grand trine with Team Malefic and Mercury — the one ruling his current placement of Virgo.
- Therefore overall it’s Team Malefic for the win, because half of Team Benefic is on their side — Neptune. Like that guy Manuel Miranda who kept giving Brett Kavanaugh information. Because the co-rulers of Aquarius, Saturn and Uranus, are conjunct, they are like conjoined twins. Actually triplets with Mars the God of War. So Mars is an unofficial third co-ruler of the chart. Because Neptune is so squarely on Mercury’s agenda, with Venus and Mercury again in Aquarius, Uranus-Saturn-Mars have this whole chart on lock. Venus and Jupiter, the benefics, serve the agenda of Team Malefic. I’m giving Mitch a late Aquarius Sun placement.
- Then the Moon, geez, with the Sun changing positions I didn’t get a chance to talk about the Moon. Mitch has the Moon conjunct fixed star Hamal, which please forgive me is not displayed on the chart above. But he has it at 6:51 Taurus, within the 2:40 orb for a star of this magnitude. Hamal is a Mars-Saturn malefic star, one that DM Hoover discusses in Exploring Critical Degrees and the Fixed Stars with respect to homicides. Hamal predisposes one to vicious, premeditated crimes — like all the GOP policy Mitch McConnell has rammed down our throats all these years. Soon come, chum. The Moon is in early Taurus here, in the Earth sign of Venus. All of this “air planet, Earth sign” stuff is one who is very much up in head head, specifically about material stuff. Got his mind on his money and his money on his mind. Not laid back. All of this will make it really hard for Mitch to relate to other people, or see himself reflected in their lives. That’s even more unrelatable than he already would be with this intense Saturn-Uranus chart. Remember Uranus views people in the abstract. Someone with this much Saturn almost certainly values people strictly on their economics.
- Mercury needs a good looking at here. Mercury and Venus are conjunct; not close, but applying, or approaching each other. It’s like when people are approaching face-to-face rather than having just passed each other. Then they’re in that grand trine with Neptune and Team Malefic. He’s ruling both Neptune and Jupiter, and thus the conscious mind is the level Mitch deals at. Underscoring the whole point of nothing sacred.
- Mercury is conjunct asteroid Lie. This is not a good sign, maybe.
- On the other side of mercury is asteroid Machiavelli, where we look for skullduggery, gamesmanship, backstabbing, that sort of thing. Social climbing. This will be especially so with the prominent Venus.
- Jupiter and Orcus are under Mercury’s rulership on Aldebaran. So Mitch definitely understands about aiming high, creating order out of chaos, fighting the darkness. But with that busted Neptune he allows Saturn, Uranus, and Mars to decide how to frame things. Neptune is about lies and illusions, propaganda, hallucinations, all sorts of things where everything gets blurry. Then Uranus is that 1,000-mile view, so it’s easy to see why he does what he does. He does understand things, has lots of Mercury bandwidth, high-intelligence individual with excellent grasp of procedure.
- Mercury is also conjunct Venus. Mitch is likely quick on his feet in conversation, witty banter, able to charm people. Should be very good at elevator talk. Mitch knows who to get in touch with and what to say. That’s his superpower.
- Vesta the True Believer is early in Capricorn. She’s not interacting with anything. But in case everything else in the chart didn’t convince you that Mitch is much more focused on money than people, here’s this. For me it just underscores the already prominent theme of Saturn being the ultimate ruler of the chart. This is all about money. As with the Netanyahus, Jeff Sessions, so many of the heavy Saturn/busted Neptune people, be on the lookout for a grift. There is a high risk of self-enrichment at the expense of integrity in this chart. Jupiter is all about spending other people’s money. Saturn is about never spending his.
- The overall chart shape is a locomotive with a Venus engine and a Neptune caboose. That fits with everything else in the chart. Neptune, personal integrity, is bringing up the rear in terms of his priorities. Like so many others, McConnell probably does feel like he’s doing the right thing for the people he loves. Unfortunately the people he loves are really into war and money.
- I have noticed with locomotive charts that there is often something prominently placed right in the center, like the native’s precious cargo, what they really care about. This is roughly across from what I call the bull’s eye, the center of the empty patch in the chart. This locomotive has about 125 empty degrees, with the center being roughly at the beginning of Sagittarius — ruled by Jupiter. The native’s psychic itchy spot involves Jupiter and his love of the big life.
- Within that context the payload of this locomotive chart is Team Malefic, over there in Taurus. See how that works? Something very noticeable right across from the empty spot, like oxygen feeding the flame of whatever they’re after in the bull’s eye. So for Mitch that probably just makes him chomp at the bit of government as an underlying emotional theme. All of that is again tied up with ideas of war and money together, with Mars, Saturn, and Jupiter conjunct in Venus. Venus generally chills things out and makes people cooler, easier to get along with. I imagine that in this chart that’s about smoothing things over, managing appearances. That’s a rather dangerous idea when you consider the contact with Algol the Blinking Demon, where anything goes.
- Last but not least, I now have to think that Mrs. Turtle, Elaine Chao, is another one of these A students who is just way too quiet up there, like General James Mattis. A preliminary glimpse at his chart reflected one who is almost certainly not a good actor in terms of what I think leadership is about. Let’s say he’s not promoting my values, like zero percent. Same with Elaine Chao. Just because they’re smart enough to not get caught spending crazy money like Tom Price or Scott Pruitt doesn’t mean they’re just fine. It means they’re effective at whatever it is they’re doing. I will be doing Elaine Chao’s chart in the near future. I’m not sure how much damage the transportation secretary can do. But she’s married to Mitch McConnell. She’s also a woman in government, so that fits the whole chart. Let’s look at Juno the Spouse.The role of Juno the Spouse is again played by Transportation Secretary Elaine Chao. That has always seemed like an odd couple to me. I can’t really imagine them naked together. She’s an attractive Asian woman, born in the Year of the Hare, and he’s more of an actual tortoise. Except I wouldn’t stop my car to carry Mitch McConnell out of the road. Anyway Mitch has Juno at 22 Scorpio, sort of in the neighborhood of the bull’s eye. Ruled by Mars and Pluto, I think that’s self-explanatory. Scorpio is the secretive, mean-spirited, vindictive part of the zodiac. It’s the sexy part, too, and she’s definitely sexier than he is at least on the surface. But in general I would say that she is someone who works for his aggressive Mars, like someone with influential connections to the Koch brothers, something like that. Dark money, secretive people. Hopefully Mueller sends them both to jail. She should also steer clear of the paramedics’ table.