Lev Parnas, Astrosplained


Long time no smell.  I haven’t been very astrological in quite a while, but I do have some things to discuss.  I will make a YouTube video for this tomorrow, and you may notice that I have lost 100 pounds.  Or maybe you won’t notice, we’ll see.

So I’m assuming you know who Lev Parnas is and can identify him in the picture above.  I find Lev utterly fascinating.  His face is like a book cover that initially scared me away from reading it, then sucked me in.  I was shocked at his English, his  hot wife, and his huge pile of receipts. He was working on becoming an oligarch, if I’m not mistaken, which is such a wild concept to me.  He’s a different kind of guy.

His Rachel Maddow interview was a gobsmacker, from the unblinking stare of Lev’s lawyer to the Ukrainian numerological rabbi who said Trump was the messiah.  Actually let me pause here to watch it again and smoke a bowl before I go back to astrologizing.



Okay here’s the chart I’m working from, courtesy of astro.com.

lev parnas chart

I don’t have a proper birth time for Lev and thus don’t have any angles.

The Sun is at  16 Aquarius, thus the chart is co-ruled by Uranus and Saturn.  Interestingly John Bolton is involved in this matter, with his prominent Uranus.  I imagine Lev is Bolton’s “dark mirror,” the hideous one who is so much like himself.  Like Wayne LaPierre, Uranus can be a planet of misanthropic, entitled loners, or at least men with no interest in empathy.  I say men because especially with Saturn, Aquarius has a very incel vibe.  The highly evolved Uranian archetype would be Nikola Tesla, with his Uranus on Algol.  And he was famously a lifelong celibate.  Uranus himself was castrated.  There is always a sort of chafing at intimacy and femininity with Aquarius.

Uranus himself is in Libra, conjunct Seginus the Guard and Juno the Spouse.  Libra is all about being accepted, being popular, being liked, having everything look great.  That explains the hot wife and Juno, and also the ruin by association.   Lev’s hot wife is now famous for being married to Lev.  I’ll come back to the ruin by association theme when I discuss Lev’s Pholus placement, but note that Trump has Jupiter on Seginus and is famous for ruining the reputations of everyone who deals with him.  Lev is another dark mirror in this way, coming out of left field (as Uranus will do) with dirty receipts on everybody from the attorney general to multiple senators and the Vice President.  All of the people who know they’re in pictures with Lev should be sweating.

So Saturn and Uranus corule the chart, and Venus is no slouch here, hosting one coruler in each of her signs.  Lev was very capable at making personal connections, stunningly so if you think about it.  I’m very impressed with his attorney, who has seems to have his shit together even if he does burn holes in people with his eyes.

Lev’s Moon is in Scorpio, coruled by Mars and Pluto.  Both of those are actually large and in charge in this chart.  So there are multiple highly-empowered planets in this chart, which is both a locomotive and a mystic rectangle.  A locomotive chart is a driven person, one who can accomplish a lot like Stephen Miller.

Then a mystic rectangle is a higher-dimensional thinker, one who can think outside the box.  With a mystic rectangle you’re always looking at a connoisseur, if not a full-on snob.  This again tracks with the hot wife.  Lev not only wouldn’t marry anyone who looks anything like himself, he probably wouldn’t hire her to clean.  So everything about the Trump ethos, the fake Versailles country clubs, the Playboy models, the access to raw power, all of that works for Lev.  His heavy Venus gives him a taste for the finer things in life, which is exacerbated by the rectangle.

Pluto and Mars, as I said, are both doing great in this chart.  Pluto is at the engine of the locomotive shape and trine coruling Saturn, which is at the caboose.  It’s opposite Venus in Pisces, which makes perfect sense.  If you wanted to have a nice conversation you’d send Marie Yovanovitch.  Lev is the guy you send to threaten Zelensky.  Speaking of Yovanovitch, Lev says he strung Rob Hyde along, that he didn’t take Hyde seriously because of his drinking.  I’m willing to bet Lev knew Hyde would absolutely harm Yovanovitch if he could, and if he had, Lev wouldn’t have cared.  But Lev is a highly capable guy, witnessed by this chart, who knew how to sidestep a high-risk person like Hyde.  You notice his buddy Igor hasn’t said a peep about anything, old-school Russian mob-style.  Nobody knows what Igor’s wife looks like.

The Moon in Scorpio may explain why Lev is out for blood and Igor says nothing.  Apparently when Trump denied even knowing him Lev was hurt. And guess what?  That Scorpio Moon doesn’t get mad, it gets even.  Mars is late in Aries here, meaning Lev is ready, willing, and able to put himself out there and make things happen.  This is in furtherance of the locomotive shape, making him one who does more than just talk.

Pluto is emphasized here, again being the engine of the locomotive and coruling the Moon.   Mark Lerner mentioned in his podcast about the plutocracy we’re dealing with, as Trump has put people like Betsy DeVos, Wilbur Ross, Steve Mnuchin, and others into key positions.  As Lerner noted even the Democrats can’t keep the billionaires out of the conversation.  Lev believed he was in the process of becoming a plutocrat himself, effecting the changes in the American government that he would need to consolidate his economic power in Ukraine.  He was driven by that motivation, that’s why it’s the engine of his locomotive.

Now that I’ve covered the rulers, luminaries, and shapes, let me dive into a few special features of this chart with respect to the asteroids.

With every locomotive chart, in addition to the locomotive and caboose there are also the payload and the void.   Those two, payload and void, are terms that I use, not official astrological terms.  In any locomotive chart there is a patch of blank real estate in the chart where there are no planets.  (Lev has nothing in Gemini through Virgo.)  Knots in the muscles are uncomfortable partly because blood can’t circulate there.  Similarly when you have no planets in a large area of the chart, certain parts of life aren’t being stimulated and they can become sort of itchy.  The center point of that empty space is often something like a psychic bull’s eye, what the person most needs in order to create balance, whether they know it or not.

Then the payload, as I call it, refers to the native’s “valuables.”  If you have a locomotive chart, the locomotive is there to move something important from one place to another, right?  I have found that there is often one or more planets directly opposite the void.  In Lev’s case the Sun is almost exactly in the center of the locomotive at 16 Aquarius.  Then in the void he has Ceres the Earth Mother at 16 Leo.  So in this case I’m not calculating the exact span and finding the center, I’m looking at the asteroid that opposes the Sun right where I expect to see an energetic relationship.

So Ceres the Earth Mother is what Lev wants the most.  Ceres the Earth Mother represents the abundance of the Earth.  If I’m not mistaken Lev’s plan was to control something about the gas production in Ukraine, which is directly on point for Ceres in this position, extracting natural resources.  Also the whole “scorched Earth” tone of Lev’s Maddow appearance; when Ceres’ daughter was kidnapped and dragged into hell, Ceres wouldn’t allow any crops to grow anywhere until she got her daughter back.  Also Ceres plunged into hell to retrieve Persephone, and thus indicates an extreme determination, and where we find the person’s strongest motivation.

This being in Leo, and opposed to the Sun in Aquarius, suggests an extreme sense of entitlement and enormous motivation for wealth.  With his extra strong Venus you’d think Lev would be a very loving guy, but I don’t think so.  His Venus is okay in Pisces generally, and she’s ruling both Uranus and Saturn, the two cranky old coots who rule this chart.  But it’s a complicated relationship where Venus is coruled by both Jupiter and Neptune.  She’s trine Neptune, but square to Jupiter, ordinarily her benefactor.  That would almost be a tie, where one boss likes you and the other doesn’t.  But both of Venus’ corulers are in Sagittarius, and thus Jupiter overrules both Neptune and Venus.  I get exactly why Lev thought Trump was the messiah.  All of this makes sense.

Anyway Venus is about being loved, not loving.  The attention comes inward.  Venus is notoriously shallow and selfish.  Because of what we know of Lev I’m not giving him the benefit of the doubt for being a generally truthful or highly evolved guy.  He’s not.  He’s the worst.  So we see the classic busted Neptune and empowered Saturn creating a grifter, like Trump’s other buddy Bibi Netanyahu.  So many Trumpers have this, shaky Neptune and raging Saturn.  They usually have large Jupiters, too.  They don’t know when to quit.

Lev’s Pallas Athena is conjunct Algol the Blinking Demon.  I noted that Qassem Soleimani had Mars on Algol, and was a legendary military leader.  Lev similarly has exceptional talents at strategy thanks to this placement of Pallas the Field Marshal.  I don’t believe Lev came from money.  I believe he worked his way into the wheels of power through his gifted Pallas on Algol.  With Algol, anything is possible.  You can look like Lev and marry that blonde and meet with the American president more often than most foreign leaders.

Lev has Vesta the True Believer at 15 Pisces, a propos of nothing except in service to the Jupter/Neptune kerfuffle I just described.  Not interacting with anything in any major way, I am led to believe that Lev isn’t a stickler for principle.  He didn’t come forward because Trump lied and he wanted the real truth out there.  No, his Scorpio Moon came forward because he was insulted and wanted to do as much damage as possible.

Another element making Lev a human hand grenade is that he has Chiron and Eris conjunct in Aries.  Chiron is where we have self-destructive tendencies, where we either learn to get control of ourselves or get ourselves killed.  Eris the Bomb Thrower is one who confronts the popular crowd because she’s not accepted.  Eris isn’t invited to a wedding, so she shows up and starts a huge fight among all the jealous women.  All of this is on the nose for the role Lev is playing in the Trump administration.

Lastly I wanted to mention Pholus the Beans Spiller.  Pholus was the centaur tasked with guarding the sacred wine of the centaurs.  Understand that in general the centaurs were a drunken, horny,  unreliable lot, with a decidedly Brett Kavanaugh flair.  So “sacred” is subjective.  Anyway Hercules (a truly strong hero) came along and either tricked or bullied Pholus into giving up the wine, which Hercules then drank all of.  The other centaurs were totally pissed at Pholus, just like a lot of people wish Lev would STFU.

Lev has Pholus at 1 Pisces, opposite fixed star Regulus.  In general I don’t consider a minor asteroid like Pholus unless it’s in contact with something.  In this case though it needs to be looked at because of the role he has played in society.  He is that beans spiller.  I am surprised to find nothing at all happening in Virgo, actually, because Lev is all about the details and keeping receipts.  It would not surprise me if he has Virgo on one of the angles.

Regulus, similarly I would not consider unless there were a planet directly on it.   Regulus is for people who are or want to be kings among men.  Regulus can bring anyone to the top of their game.  But it’s also notorious for crashing people right back down if they mess up.   Case in point Harvey Weinstein with his Regulus contact, who went from being a rapist with carte blanche to likely dying in prison after people describe his disgusting body in court.  But again because of the freakish synchronicity of Lev’s role, where he has dirt on the king that could crash him to the ground, wow that Pholus placement is an eye-popper.






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